Saturday, May 26, 2012


We are en route to a little place in Missouri called Branson for a little family time. It will be nice for a little get away time. The next shared list will be released on Monday but we are told that the block is not completely cleared from our agency after all, so we aren't counting on a match. So, for now we are enjoying time with each other, belting out Eddie Vedder and Adele tunes on the road. Below, things growing in the back yard and a room coming together for her.

Wednesday, May 23, 2012


Most unexpectedly, we received our login date (LID) yesterday. Such a blessing! I certainly wasn't expecting it so soon, given the word around the internet street. Around the yard, things are blooming and seedlings are showing off. Progress!
first rose of summer

The bleeding hearts have nearly bled out by now



Saturday, May 12, 2012

A milestone

Our dossier is en route to country as of 2 days ago! Wait, hope, dream, repeat.

Wednesday, May 09, 2012

The garden to grow

Below, a smattering of images from the very beginning of garden de Utter 2012. Ben and the beagles play a supporting role. This is my first attempt with dahlias-isn't that tuner bulb amazing?

Sunday, May 06, 2012

Hopes dashed, slightly up again.

I have now logged hours pouring over profiles of children who might possibly become ours. So many beautiful young faces, completely oblivious that their picture is viewed hundreds of times by longing parents-to-be. I wonder how they will feel 10, 15 years from now when they're told (if they are), "honey I knew it was meant to be the moment I saw your face online, just like when I saw your father's profile on e harmony." :)

To use the biological child analogy, this is very much akin to being "late." Unfortunately, so far each child that would be great from the tiny details that I am give have been matched with a family by the time I hear back from various agencies. This feels very similar to the negative pregnancy test. Another month, another round of pictures, more hope. 

Our documents have now returned from the Consulate in Chicago and we are told, ready to go to her country this week. That stage of "DTC," or dossier to country, would be very exciting indeed if we hadn't been informed that for now, our agency is not matching families with this specific country. We do not know how long this will be on hold. It could be another week or months. This roadblock seems particularly unfair and I cannot shake the sorrow. I think the gray weather and endless Bon Iver on Pandora is NOT helping. 

If you read this and are the praying kind, we ask for your prayers. 

In the meantime, we play and soak in spring

Wednesday, May 02, 2012

6 Years

I find April in Minnesota to be heart breaking at times. The green has arrived, last bits of snow have melted, hyacinths are coming forth from the earth and lo, it's time to mix it up with a little rainy snowy mix! I expected no less for our anniversary weekend, as our wedding day was a drenching, soggy, wondrous occasion. Determined to make a little of my outdoor reception alive, I, with sweet brave friends, put up twinkle lights in the pouring rain. We took them down later - strands and strands - and they now adorn our Christmas tree and backyard.
Back to low weather expections - it was then, not with surprise that we left for our weekend getaway under clouds. I had been looking forward to getting away to the country side with such fierceness that nothing could bring me down, not even the minor detail of leaving without my suitcase(!)
We arrived after long winding roads into the Wisconsin Valley and were met with the B & B owners, who were such a pleasant, easy couple, that the entire weekend felt much more like visiting friends.
The sun did peek out Sunday morning and I managed to take a few pictures. I did not get a picture of my feeding a lamb in the pouring rain, however. That one will have to stay imprinted in my memory alone.
It was great to get on a bike and go for miles with so very little traffic (an advantage of staying near so many Amish farms), though I hadn't imagined going 40 miles!
Happy Anniversary, love.