One week in

We are nearing the mark of being together longer at home than in Guangzhou. It may just be me, but each time stamp that brings us together for longer than we've been apart/moving around/etc helps to ease the tension of worrying about his comfort. What does he think when he wakes up in this room? What goes through his mind when we strap him in the carseat? Does he feel a little less uncertainty each time? This is my full time job, at least for the time I have at home. I go back to work in less than two weeks, which sounds just awful for attachment until I remember, oh yes, I am off every other week and during the day from the moment he wakes until the late ish afternoon.

At this time stamp, Thomas has shown us the most delightful laugh. We know it can be elicited with rolling him over and over and tickling his neck. He has gone from shaking with fear when the dogs are around to feeding them and holding the leash. His independent spirit has broken somewhat free and he is (like his sister) very interested in latching his own seat belts and going up and down stairs without my hand. It is a far far change from our first couple of days home in which I had to hold him continuously. I think the secret is in the squeaky shoes. Wearing them seems to bolster his confidence.

He loves music, enjoys the little piano tremendously, and noticeably relaxes when we sing to him.

We are working on communication, moving from grunts and wails to "mama help" and "mama please." It's a process.

His cries are guttural and deeply intense. I can't tell if he's grieving, but sometimes I hold him through it in case he is, not trying to suppress or stop the cry.

A day at a time, from moment to moment, trying to breathe, slow down, and see the forest when the trees are being whiny. :)

Watching Baba power wash

discovering sticks and dirt

helping clean out mama's summer garden 

sunday morning 

what are we supposed to be looking at?

Home for the first time

 

29 hours, three planes,  16 long lines, a handful of tantrums and very very little sleep later, we made it home. Ah, travel, the end and the beginning really really stink but the actual experience is everything. 

One last note from China

While I write, Ben is out watch shopping and the kids are snoozing away. We used our last day to explore the "safari park" that is one hour outside the city, which, in a city of 25 million, is saying something. The park was wonderful and well worth whatever we paid to get in! It was kind of like a more open, lush, interactive zoo. There are stations to feed many of the animals and over lunch we watched the Tigers being fed (Serena's favorite). There were panda triplets and toucans and only one meltdown, which we all survived. See photos on the Facebook album :) not of the meltdown, though ben did take pictures of it "to look back on later." I nearly fed him to the tigers at that point. 

We are sad to leave China again but looking forward to returning home. Tomorrow Thomas will board three planes. Let's hope he weathers them the way he has weathered all of his other firsts: short plane ride, paddle boat, escalator, many many elevators, taxi, cruise boat, and subway. All within 1.5 weeks. 

We will be cocooning upon returning home as much as we can for this little guy to feel safe and come to understand love, but do send messages and visit!